It’s very hard to get a man to commit to you if he isn’t emotionally attached to you.
However, emotional attachment is actually not the most important element when getting a man to commit to you, but it really helps to:
It also ensures that he will stick around for a longer period. (Hopefully forever.)
Something that is important to note also, is that men usually don’t let themselves get attached to the wrong woman.
In fact, if he doesn’t see you as the ‘right’ woman, then he will do everything in his power to minimize his attachment to you, and keep the relationship strictly casual and sex oriented.
(We’ll talk more about how to show up as the right woman to almost any man shortly.)
Knowing that men will try to minimize their emotional attachment to you if they don’t see you as the right woman, it makes sense that you should try to look for signs of emotional attachment from him.
Additionally, when you suspect he’s not emotionally attached to you, it’s in your best interests to slow things right down and see if it’s possible to inspire him to become emotionally attached to you.
What Is Emotional Attachment?
Emotional attachment is the feeling of connection, warmth and safety you receive from the bond you develop with someone.
If a man is emotionally attached to you, he will feel like you are an integral part of his life and his happiness.
Healthy Emotional Attachment Vs Unhealthy Emotional Attachment
Though every feminine woman will want her chosen man to be emotionally attached to her, you also want the right kind of emotional attachment.
Specifically, you want him to form a healthy emotional attachment to you, not an unhealthy emotional attachment.
What is an unhealthy emotional attachment?
It’s when a man is attached to you emotionally, but only for the purposes of sucking resources from you.
That’s unhealthy because it will drain you of valuable emotional energy.
But it could also lead to a situation where you don’t feel attracted to him because you feel like his parent, while he is your dependent.
You don’t want a child, you want a man.
An emotional attachment that’s unhealthy is one where:
- It isn’t based on emotional connection
- It spreads toxicity
- Your emotional resources are heavily skewed towards his needs while you get neglected; or
- One or both of you become codependent
What is a healthy emotional attachment?
An emotional attachment that’s healthy is one where you are both attached to each other emotionally through:
- Shared experiences
- Shared emotions; and
- Through developing a pair bond
Simply put, when an emotional attachment is unhealthy, you or your man are emotionally connected to your own needs and not to the other person’s.
Before we begin to look at the signs he’s emotionally attached to you, we should get really clear on what emotional attachment actually is.
By the way, here’s a video I made on the most important signs a guy is emotionally attached to you…
8 Ultimate Signs A Man Is Emotionally Attached To You
#1: He Wants to Spend As Much Time As He Possibly Can With You.
The ultimate sign a man is emotionally attached is that he always wants to spend time with you.
And I don’t mean he wants sex from you or that he hangs off you because he is lonely or has nothing better to do.
I mean, he forgoes other important things in his life in order to spend quality time with you.
And he will really want to do this – of his own accord. You won’t have to try to make him do it.
#2: He Mirrors Your Habits And Interests.
When a man is emotionally attached to you, he will start to like a lot of the things that you like and mirror your habits and interests.
It may not even be a conscious thing that he does, but rather, a subconscious way he tries to:
- Get closer to you
- Inspire you to trust him; and
- Feel even more emotionally connected to you
When we are attached to someone and we love them, we want more shared experiences with them.
We want to connect with them over what they connect with, as this makes you become ‘one’ with the other person.
By the way, if you want your man to take things to the next level with you, it’s crucial to know that there’s one specific emotional trigger within every masculine man that makes him want to commit to you.
He will want to take care of you (and only you)…
#3: He Makes Sure You’re OK Before He Leaves.
This is an important sign he’s emotionally attached to you, primarily because it’s a sign he’s reciprocating your attachment to him.
A man who is emotionally attached to you will know and feel how emotionally attached you are to him.
This is because his attachment to you will mean he’s attuned to you and how attached you are to him.
Because of that, he’ll be more aware of how you feel that he’ll know it may not be easy on you before he goes away or leaves.
See, a man who is emotionally attached to you will be sensitive to how his absence may leave a bit of a void in your heart.
A man who is detached from you will not care about that.
He also won’t care about your wellbeing, safety or comfort.
If your man shows that he wants to make sure you have everything you need before he leaves, you can conclude that this is a man who is emotionally attached to you in a healthy way.
Would you like to find out how likely he is to commit to you in the future? Our quick and free quiz will give you the answer:
#4: He Doesn’t Mind Feeling What You Feel.
Other than being one of the strong signs a man is emotionally attached to you, this is the ultimate sign a man cares about you.
If a man is willing to selflessly feel what you feel, then he’s going to be emotionally attached to you.
Even if at first he is doing it strictly for your sake, over time he will feel attached to you because he will become emotionally invested in you.
How would you know whether a man is willing to feel what you feel?
You’ll know when he mirrors your emotions back to you, and shares your sadness or anger.
but ultimately, you have to be the judge of whether he’s feeling what you feel. So stay attuned and you’ll feel it.
#5: He Knows A Lot About You
An emotionally attached guy is going to know a lot of information about you, and he’s going to remember most of it.
This is because he’s been so emotionally connected to you over time that the things you tell him stay stuck in his memory.
I’ve met couples who had been together for years yet the man didn’t even know his woman’s favorite color or favorite hobby.
Sure, a guy doesn’t have to know every last detail about you, because he isn’t you at the end of the day.
But he’ll know enough to make you feel like he truly cares.
And if you’ve said something hundreds of times to him, you’ll see that he doesn’t forget it.
Because he was listening.
And he’s attached, so what you like and value matters to him.
There are 7 common signs a woman is perceived as low value to all men, because men simply perceive value differently to women. Do you know what these signs are and how to avoid them like the plague? CLICK HERE to download this special report.
#6: He Asks For Your Opinion
Most intelligent, masculine men will make their own decisions and have their own direction in life, especially when it comes to finances, politics or sports.
However, one of the signs a man is attached to you is that he will try to take your opinion into account on things.
Maybe not for everything, as there will be things you know nothing about that he knows a lot about, like:
- How to fix the TV
- How to service your car
- How to fix your laptop or phone; or
- What the best tool for building a bookcase would be
So your opinion may be inconsequential when it comes to those things.
But he’ll ask for your opinion on important stuff.
For example, stuff related to your future together or things that he knows you feel strongly about or will impact your happiness, like:
- Big health decisions related to him or your kids
- Whether he should take up a new job opportunity
- Where you guys should live
- What type of house you should live in
- What you think of his friends or family members
- Where you should go for a holiday
If you find he doesn’t take your opinion into account on important things, try to think whether there’s some emotional disconnect between you, or whether he might not be as committed as you’d like.
It’s never nice feeling left out or forgotten, but also try not to blame him for it. Try to see that there’s always a reason for things, even if you don’t understand them just yet.
If he has hurt or frustrated you over this issue before, you can say two specific words to him that will allow you to learn how much he truly cares about you…
#7: He Tries To Protect You
Does he try to shield you from harm or check up on you when you’re out together and another guy hits on you?
Is he angry when someone else hurts you or betrays you?
Does he stick up for you in conflicts or unfair situations?
Does he try to contribute to your health?
Stop you getting into trouble?
If so, he’s trying to protect you and that’s because he’s emotionally attached to you and doesn’t want to see you suffer.
What a lovely feeling that is, enjoy it!
#8: There’s Physical Intimacy That Is Not Sexual
One clear sign of emotional attachment from a guy is that there will be signs of physical intimacy that aren’t driven by the desire for sex.
Instead they’re driven by empathy, protectiveness and affection.
The presence of physical intimacy that’s not sexual is key because for any man to feel emotionally attached to you, there would need to be an exchange of physical intimacy to some extent.
And this physical gesture will symbolize the emotional intimacy between you.
Imagine if you guys never, ever so much as gave each other a goodbye hug.
Imagine if he never even placed his hand on yours reassuringly.
Imagine if you weren’t looking carefully when crossing a road, and he didn’t bother grabbing your hand to pull you to safety.
Or at the very least, imagine if you guys never even shook each other’s hand to congratulate each other when one of you achieves something important.
It wouldn’t seem right.
And would you still consider yourselves to be emotionally attached to each other?
When it comes to attachment between humans, there’s always a physical element at some point, no matter how small.
Even if it’s a quick pat on the shoulder.
The important thing to know is that a man who is emotionally attached to you will engage in physical intimacy with you, and you’ll feel in your gut that it’s not always tainted with that “push” for sex.
Some examples of physical intimacy that aren’t sexual include:
- An arm around the shoulder when walking down the street
- Holding hands while walking
- Sitting shoulder to shoulder
- Him laying his head on your shoulder or chest (and vice versa)
How Much Is A Man’s Emotional Attachment Worth?
It’s great to know a man is emotionally attached to you.
But what does it all mean for your future together?
And is it even enough to keep him around?
A man being emotionally attached to you is worth a lot.
It means you have someone in your life. That’s more than what a lot of people have.
But there’s something else that’s arguably worth just as much, if not more (especially when it’s absent from the relationship), and that’s having him fall in love with you.
Usually, if a man is emotionally attached, he’ll also be in love with you, or would have fallen in love with you in the past and formed a pair bond.
But that’s not always the case.
In some situations, a guy may just become emotionally attached to you, but he doesn’t feel anything for you romantically.
For example, if you’ve always just been friends or friends with benefits, and over time he becomes attached to you.
But if he’s fallen in love with you 25 years ago and you guys still have a great relationship with enough emotional attraction and emotional connection, it’s far less likely that he will fall in love with another woman.
Because you’ve already occupied that space in his life.
Regardless – the key takeaway is that you don’t just want to have an emotionally attached guy!
You want him to fall in love with you and see you as his one and only.
If you’re the one and only, he’ll belong to you forever.
Unless you betray him or hurt him deeply. Or you’re unbearably toxic.
Let me explain the importance of being the one and only (because there really is nothing more important for your love life.)
Seek to be The One And Only, Not The Woman He’s Attached To
When it comes to men and dating, they place women in one of two categories – never both.
- Category #1: You’re the ‘one and only’.
- Category #2: You’re the ‘one of many’.
Remember at the beginning of the article I mentioned that we’d talk more about what it means to become the right woman for any man?
Well, the right woman is the one he categorizes as his one and only.
You can only be in the one and only category if he falls in love with you.
Otherwise, you’re the one of many.
Even if he likes you.
Even if you’ve known each other for 65 years.
Even if you’ve been sleeping together for 100 years.
So don’t seek his emotional attachment, unless he’s already fallen in love with you.
Seek to be his one and only. Because that’s where the real value lies for you as a woman.
That’s when you can be sure that he will go above and beyond to make you feel:
- Radiant; and
No woman could ever compare to you. And you will feel like you’re on cloud 9.
I know it sounds sappy and so outdated in this feminist world.
It seems to not be acceptable to even mention that a man could be of such worth in your life.
But this is the experience all women want in their heart of hearts, and you can have it too.
If you’d like me to show you the 5 feminine secrets to have him fall madly in love with you and beg you to be his one and only, then you might want to check out my program “Becoming His One And Only”.
The promise of this course is for you to have your chosen man fall in love with you & beg you to be his one & only by embodying these 5 feminine secrets, even if he’s been distant, avoidant, or losing interest…
In any healthy relationship, there will be signs of emotional attachment.
The key is that the emotional attachment each of you feel should be a healthy one, serving you both to feel a bond with each other.
The emotional attachments formed in each relationship will be and feel different. And unfortunately, in some relationships it will be a toxic, unhealthy attachment.
This type of attachment is not valuable to you, even though you may be emotionally attached to him.
Having a man form a healthy emotional attachment to you is a wonderful thing and deserves to be cherished, but much more valuable is to have him in love with you.
Renee is the founder of The Feminine Woman & co-founder of Shen Wade Media where we teach women how to show up as a high value high status woman whom easily inspires a deep sense of emotional commitment from her chosen man. Together with her husband D. Shen at Commitment Triggers blog, they have positively influenced the lives of over 15 million women through their free articles and videos as well as 10’s of thousands through paid programs through the Shen Wade Media platform.
Connect deeper with her work through the social media links below.