Do want help in avoiding divorce? This divorce attorney wrote a guidebook for you. Listen to this important episode!
Sarah Intelligator is a divorce attorney in Los Angeles, California. Practicing Family Law since 2008, Sarah has also been a yoga instructor since 2000. She organically bridged her two worlds, coining the term: “Holistic Divorce and Family Law.” In helping others through their divorces, Sarah realized that she could help them avoid divorce altogether. This inspired her to author her first book: “Live, Laugh, True Love: A Step-By-Step Guide to Dating and Finding a Meaningful Relationship, from a Divorce Attorney.” In her spare time, Sarah enjoys traveling and spending time with her son, Eli, and husband, Joel. She also dabbles in interior design.
In this episode of Last First Date Radio:
- How being a divorce attorney equips her to comment on relationships
- The 6 F words that lead to relationship failure
- An exercise to help define what’s most important in a relationship
- Good questions to ask on a date to determine if they’re right for you
EP 582: Sarah Intelligator – A Divorce Attorney’s Guide to Avoiding Divorce
How does your experience as a divorce attorney equip you to comment on relationships and avoiding divorce?
I went through my own divorce when I was young. Having practiced law for so many years, I began to see patterns that were redundant and I could see why relationships fail. I want people not to have to go through the devastation of divorce.
What are some of the reasons you see relationships fail or what you call the “F” words?
- Fundamental values
- Fairy tale
Can you share an exercise to help people define what’s most important to them in a relationship?
Think about what you value today. Then, take a step back and ask what has been important in the past few decades. Are some of these values changing as you get older, like travel? Adventure is the fundamental value. Maybe you can both seek adventure together in a way that’s sustainable.
Do you have any questions people can ask to find out quickly if their partner is right for them?
Once you’ve defined your fundamental values, come up with ‘the job interview’ questions based on your values. Ask ‘why’ questions. Listen to the answers carefully. For example if religion is a fundamental value and you’re a devout Catholic, then someone who’s atheist or agnostic or a different religion may not be a good match. You can say, “I can’t do anything on Sunday because I go to church every Sunday.” Then gauge their reaction.
What’s your best advice for anyone who wants to go on their last first date?
There is someone out there for you. A lot of people sell themselves short because they define themselves on their issues and what happened in the past. Define yourself on what you have to offer. Have confidence in your innate value. You are worthy of love.
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