Tuesday, June 13, 2023

Create the relationship you want

But how?

Image: Elora Canne

Self-awareness, for one. And effort for another.

Neither romance nor love are going to land in your lap if you just sit back staring into space. Unless you’re gazing at the stars with the love of your life cuddled up next to you – but you have to make that happen, right?

Let’s start with self-awareness: If you don’t know what you want, you can’t make it happen – go figure.

Figure out what kind of relationship makes you happy, then set your intentions to plan for it. 

For example:

  • do you want more travel and adventure, 
  • or romance and fine dining? 
  • perhaps you’d prefer more quiet date-nights-in, or snuggled up for more movie nights?

Whatever it is that you want more of, you have to, 

a) know, and, 

b) make it happen.

So that’s your project for this month, to figure out what you want more of in your relationship. Perhaps you want a combination of all 3 of my suggestions above. Or, perhaps you can add ideas of your own.


Travel/Adventure: Yes/No

If yes, where do I want to go?

What adventures do I want to experience?


Romance/Fine Dining: Yes/No

What kind of romance do I yearn for?

What restaurants do I want to try?


More date-nights-in/movie nights: Yes/No

What kind of date-nights-in will be special enough?

Which movies would I like us to watch together?


Then, next month, we’ll work on figuring out how to make it happen.

Elora is a nonfiction relationships writer living just outside of Sydney, Australia with her husband and their Ragdoll cat, Maisie Moonlight.

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