Here Is The GOSPEL AND BITTER TRUTH Concerning Marriage That No One Wants To Tell You

THE PROBLEM OF TRANSPARENCY IN MARRIAGE…
Is there a marriage in this world where both partners are hundred percent (100%) transparent with themselves? Is there a marriage where some problems  (even the tiniest issues) aren’t invisible? To what degree can a spouse open up on personal or marital issues?

Please let me start by saying that this is not an encyclopedic treatise on the subject concern; it’s just a basis, and I will be sharing more on this from time to time. So today, let’s discuss the TRUTH and FACTS. Let me commence with the TRUTH of God’s word first. 
Frankly speaking, marriage should be a place of full clarity, a place of no enigmas. That was what God had planned marriage to be when he said both shall become one flesh. They were to accomplish oneness in their partnership just as God and Jesus Christ are. They were to be bound to the point that keeping things away from the other partner would be virtually impossible. That’s the idea of the standard and perfect marriage. No enigmas whatsoever. No mysteries at all.

Transparency is very essential in marriage. It strengthens faith and confidence and love between the two partners. It regulates trust problems between hubbies. The justification why some spouses can’t trust themselves at all or anymore is because of an absence of transparency caused by past shady deals, such as extramarital affairs, mismanagement of money, etc, from either one party or both. Transparency needs virtue. It demands also some incredible guts. Transparency is activated by the insight into what true love for one’s spouse is. It’s part of our responsibility to our marital vows. 

Marriage is a powerful kind of partnership that exists for ages. It’s to be lived in prosperity and poverty, in good health and ill health, until death does us part. Unfortunately, a lot of partners are just good friends or best of friends in marriage and nothing additional. That’s why with many of these husbands and wives, money causes issues and sometimes almost wants to tear their marriages apart. No, that shouldn’t be. Marriage is a lifetime partnership between a man and a woman as husband and wife. Spouses are suggested to be partners in progress. Money matters or any kind of issues shouldn’t shatter a home. Marital crises should strengthen the union preferably, because, like faith, love is pleasingly seen in times of challenges or willful circumstances. 

May your marriage not crack up in Jesus’ name.

Now let me speak to you about the FACTS. Realistically, there is nothing like an ideal marriage. The only perfect marriage will be the marriage of Jesus (the Lamb) to his bride (the Church) Kindly read Revelation chapter 18. The elevated one can get in marriage is the tag “very blissful marriage” or “very good exemplary marriage” not or never “perfect marriage”. Do you know the reason why? This is because we are all imperfect beings still aspiring for perfection. And it’s not the weakness of the spouses in marriage. 

Imperfections are mostly the justification for most marriage predicaments. Believe me, if we were excellent human beings in the class of God in reasonable terms, we would have immaculate marriages. We won’t have hurtful fellows, toxic relationships and marriages, domestic violence, infidelity, cheating, lies, shady deals, unforgiveness, malice, misappropriation, lawlessness, separations, divorces, etc. We would have perfect beings encountering and enjoying perfect marriages. But that is not the issue for now. Slowly but certainly, God is putting up with us there. However, we are encouraged to enhance ourselves daily through the instrumentality of God’s word, the understanding of marriage, and our willingness and enthusiasm to do the right thing at all times. 

Friends, honestly, here is the GOSPEL AND BITTER TRUTH concerning marriage that no one wants to tell you: transparency can’t be 100% in marriage in all circumstances. Please don’t get me wrong with this. I am not speaking about spouses doing wrong and bad things and attempting to cover up their paths or hide them from their spouses. I am not even making a speech about cheating in marriage or relationships, shady deals, corruption, or the like. I am talking about the good motives only. 
When I newly met my wife, one specialty that gave me a “concern” over her was that she is bothered a lot by issues. Many times she would be in tears, acting like somebody who tried to carry the troubles of the whole world. That isn’t a minus at all. I understood her humanness. 

That is who she is and I love her that way. That is the manner she was wired, a very spirited being. It is not a sin or crime to be that way, it’s alright? So when I saw that, as a coach,  I determined that I will help her straighten up in that area (in marriage spouses improve each other. She has also enhanced me from an impatient man to a patient gentleman). But for the time standing, for her own SAKE, with a straightforward conscience, I determined that I won’t tell her my personal “bad news” going on with me in the office or my family so as not to put her in that state of bothering. Do you now get my story?
So one day we were trusting God for a difference of job for me (as the payment of staff paychecks at my former company was becoming a very big problem). 

My wife was out of a job for some time. She was continually at home thinking, worrying, and crying. I attended a consultation with a very big firm. We had prayed and fasted for me to get that job. The interview began very well, I was in possession, and the officials of the company liked me. I was too sure to have gotten the job because they were impressed by my examination scores ( I came out tops), brilliance, and professionalism. But all of a sudden things changed It was like a spell was initiated somewhere and I was restricted from the job. I was greatly dissatisfied and felt like crying that day. I love and cherished my wife like “what”, but at this point, knowing her passionate temperament to bad news and what it would turn on in her, wisdom directed that I held on to that “bad news” for some moment. So I did. But after some time I told her stylishly about it.

Husbands, it’s not all the bad news you tell your wife instantly and plainly. (particularly the wives with fragile feelings or heart or medical situations). Please know and comprehend your spouse’s character and find a convenient way or manner to relate with or to her. My wife trusts me very much. We trust each other very greatly and we don’t have dirty mysteries in our marriage. I hope you figure out my point here now. I didn’t want her to break down, because what I was seeing then about her emotions required wisdom. And that’s what I accomplished. No bad motives, too. So there is no dispute here. Over the years, with the help of God and mine, my wife has enhanced a lot. Now she bothers less and doesn’t weep again at all. Sometimes, I tickled her by saying, “Won’t you cry a bit”, with a smile, she will say, “For where?”. Now, I tell her all my bad announcements without the fear that she will break down.

Some marriages have very awful backgrounds. Transparency is absent because of their hurtful characters, twisted understanding of what marriage is, and immaturity. Trust between them is at its inadequate ebb. It’s either they began their marital journey that way or perhaps something went amiss along the way. Genuine love is transparent. In marriage, partners are not opponents, but partners in progress.