Monday, June 12, 2023

Reasons Why Men Cheat or Divorce

There are many reasons why men leave their wives after many years together, after 10 years, 15 years, 20 years or 30 years of marriage, when a man walks out of his wife, when they didn’t see it coming. 

Let me share with you some reasons why a man can walk out on a marriage after many years together.
*Control: Men hate control, Men were wired to lead, If you are controlling your money, it's a matter of time before your bubble is burst. They love being on top of the game. They like running the show. 
And women ask me what is controlling a man? Let me break it down for you; You have the final say where you choose to go to courage. You have this final say whether to rent or buy a house, where to buy it what type of a house you always have a final say about your money; Your children know it, Everyone close to you knows it, your siblings, your parents know you're running the show; Even your work colleagues knows you're running the show. It won't take long before your bubble is burst and this guy walks out on you. He doesn't want to be drugged. He wants to run the show. He wants to feel in control of staff so you can have your way without him knowing that you're controlling him. A wise woman will make the husband feel like he made the division by consulting by involving him in decision making.
*Sexlessness: So many men and women underestimate the role of sex in marriage or relationship. They think sex is a side issue. I can tell you that it is a central issue; men need sex. He married you for sexual intimacy. He can do anything else with his brothers, sisters and friends. The only thing that makes it unique between you and him is sexual intimacy. 
Think about this; what you're doing with your husband. There are many other things in terms of your work, career, dreams, that you can pursue it any other men, including your siblings, your dad, your friends, but what makes you so unique is intimacy. It is a central issue in marriage; infidelity in marriage is not just getting out of marriage, but also sexlessness. 
Men need sex the same way we need food, or shelter. We need sex and if you have been manipulating your man sexually, it's just a matter of time before the guy begins to cheat on you or to walk out on you permanently.
*Extra Marital Affairs: when a woman cheats on the partner, Most relationships break, some heals, some recover. 
And I believe in restoring such relationships. So many couples come to us or email us for advice especially these days. People  email us from all over the world every single week. And by the Grace of God, saved a lot of couples from breaking their marriages after an extramarital affair. But too many men can't handle. We are selfish by nature. “So what goes on in the mind of a man that when a woman says to the man, she likes or admire a guy” for men, sex is an act of submission. So when the wife steps out, he feels attacked, this is an external assault, he feels you have submitted to another man because we know women can’t sleep with a man unless they invested emotionally. That's why many marriages when a woman cheats, and especially if, during the cheating she conceived the guy has gone to work for so long. He comes back home and tries to do the math but he can tell this pregnancy is not mine. This child is not mine. His problem is not about it's not the child. His problem is not the child, his problem is that he feels cheated. It feels you're sleeping with men around, he doesn't think you are weighed out to us. He thinks this is your lifestyle.

Read Also: Secret Ways to Show Your Love

*Lack of Appreciation: This is very common when men are in their mid life especially between 40 and 60 years of age. A lot of families break because of unknown.
When woman starts comparing her husband whether consciously or unconsciously with other men. I want you to know this; as a woman, your man gets out of college or high school and tries to give his best shot. Men get out as sprinters...they are not marathoners; they try their very best but sometimes faith take its toll on them. It's very simple, a very rich man, a very successful man by human standards to think I made it on my own. I'm a self made man. I did it. Let me tell you, God plays such a huge role in human lives  believe it or not. Such a role that we cannot even measure the magnitude of his involvement in the outcome of our lives. Yes, we have to work hard Be persistent. Keep a positive mental attitude, work smart, networking etc; we have to do all that. But at the end of the day promotion does not come from the north or from the south or from the east or the west. It does not come from cutting deals or even networking promotion comes from God. At the end of the day, blessings come from God. So when you begin to compare your man with the achievements of other men. Then the man feels unappreciated. And starts going out to celebrate, he goes out to a younger person who can celebrate him who can love him for who he is. This is a non-return route.
*Children Left Home: Empty Nest: What's that? When children leave? There are many marriages are seen immediately their children go to the University or they get married and they leave the marriage. Many marriages are kept together because of the children. I mean, so when the children leave that emptiness; that house is now exposed. That's surely the only reason why they never separated. He loved his children. He never wanted his children to be fatherless. Even he didn't know the impact. They never were life partners. They never were sex partners. They never were fun partners. So when the parenting role leaves the state of your marriage, their marriage crumbles, it has nothing to them together. 
*Wife Neglecting Herself: Yes, you heard me right. while neglecting herself when you were dating, You took care of your hair, you took care of your nails, you're dressing sexy, exercises, and you always enjoy. And years bye, you took it for granted that this guy or husband is for me permanent Wow. There are no permanent things in this life.

There is nothing permanent in marriage or relationship. Breaking Point is always there. Men are visual. “We are like squirrels; we are trotted by shiny objects”. So guess what, we will always notice that women who are grooming, if you continuously neglect yourself, you are putting your man at a risk of cheating on you. I know you don't like that statement. Yes, yes, there is no justification for a man cheating on you. There is no justification for him walking out on you. Yes, he should not leave his wife. He should not leave this marriage. I have drained all that. In fact, I strongly believe and advocate for leadership on the role of men. I truly believe in all that. It is his role to lead. It is his role to challenge you to dress well. It is his duty to buy you an outfit to show you go to the hair salon. Some of it is his duty. But hey, Come on... There are so many men who don't do that. So we'll blame him; blame game will not salvage your marriage. So if your man is not taking initiative, he's not leading you as he ought to. That is your duty to love yourself, at least for your own sake. I mean, yourself confidence, yourself esteem goes up. When you're feeling hot, when you're dressed. Right. When you take care of yourself, so the moment you don't take care of yourself. I regret to tell you this, the overwhelming majority of men will end up cheating on you and some will permanently walk out of their wives, because men are visual. I know this is a hard thing to tell a woman. But again the question in your mind is why did he walk away so I'm recording it for you there are men who walk away because he just want good time based on physical attractions.

So love yourself and embrace yourself. Take care of your physical. Wear sexy cloths, underwear bras and perfume yourself. 
*Conflicts: You know their marriages, they are having the same conflicts since they had got married, years on still the same issue. They're still fighting over money, fighting over in-laws, fighting over sex, fighting over control, fighting over drinking. You're having the same same issues or challenges. Woman Yes, I know your mom should lead. Yes, I know your mom should have helped you to overcome these conflicts by now. Yes, I understand all that and So let me suggest today. Suppose you change the blanket and focus on yourself and ask yourself what can I do to some of these conflicts! Focus on yourself development. Because you can ever change him, and argument will never resolve any conflict. Speak to a Professional or Marriage Counsel Group.

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Remember we’re here to help….Remain Blessed

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