Wednesday, December 27, 2023

Resisting Change Leads to the Groundhog Day of Relationship Insanity


It’s easy to believe that you’re open to change if you’ve tended to lose yourself in your relationships. All the morphing, blending, and adapting to suit other people’s agendas was really you catering to your beliefs about yourself, love, and relationships. It masqueraded as compromise, love, and trying to please your partner at all costs.

Relationship Insanity involves carrying the same baggage, beliefs, behaviours, and attitudes, choosing variations of the same person in a different package, or gravitating to similar situations, and then expecting different results. It’s Groundhog Day where a little voice inside says, ‘I told you so’, and a part of you closes off, convinced that you are indeed ‘not good enough’, or that it’s best to settle for crumbs, or to avoid relationships altogether. It might feel safer to keep trying to get others to take responsibility for loving and caring for you than to get to know and understand yourself so that you can do it. But this only leaves you with ‘partners’ who want to take control, which isn’t love, so the pain continues.

Your old beliefs about you and your past represent your understanding at that time, so not updating them is akin to resisting feeling and living better. Don’t mistake trying to make things stay the same as a security blanket when it’s really a smothering blanket stifling your healing, learning, and growth.

Step into a new chapter of love and self-awareness with the ‘Break The Cycle’ ecourse.

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