Just as I thought, this table of information is so valuable. I would take each feeling and place it into a question for my partner.
I would ask my partner: “How can I best support you?” or “How do you want me to support you?”
“When do you feel most desired by me?” or “What do I do that makes you feel wanted/ desired by me?”
Another example would be: “Do you feel appreciated/ respected by me in our relationship?”
If you have a female partner, the following questions would be like a breath of fresh air to us women:
What makes you feel safe and secure in our relationship?
When do you feel the most loved by me?
How can I best support you?
Intimacy is vulnerability.
Intimacy is feeling exposed when you share yourself and your internal world with someone else. Mental, emotional and spiritual intimacy run even deeper than physical intimacy in my opinion. To be fully seen, heard and understood is a different sort of nourishment – it feels healing, secure and abundant.
Intimacy/ this depth of vulnerability is also scary, I can’t disregard that. But the reward of deep connection, being fully seen, supported and celebrated for who you truly are is worth leaning into every wince of discomfort.
This is very likely one of my favorite findings/ articles I’ve written this year. I would love for you to ask your partner these questions. I deeply believe this information and questions have the ability to help couples share & understand each other’s feelings, needs and desires within a partnership.
Feel free to DM me on Instagram about this article or share your experience if you talked about this with your partner!